


Patience

by LoversComet



Category: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, South Park
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Crossover, Crossover Pairings, Depressing, Depression, Don't Like Don't Read, Heavy Angst, M/M, My First AO3 Post, OTP Feels
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-03
Updated: 2019-08-03
Packaged: 2020-07-30 03:37:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20090638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoversComet/pseuds/LoversComet
Summary: It started off slow.Everything in their relationship did. But for once in his life, Eric had the dignity, the tolerance, to contribute enough patience for someone. Was that even possible? How is that possible? After spending his entire existence guarding his emotions until nothing but anger pours out of his very being, how could all of that vanish so quickly every time he sees those beautiful, emerald eyes avoid his own bitter, golden ones?He was now so vulnerable; weak; unguarded. But if he ever had the choice to become so defenseless, sensitive, towards anyone's timid gaze, he wouldn't mind the unlucky bastard to be him. His best friend. His lover. His world.





	Patience

It started off slow.

Everything in their relationship did. But for once in his life, Eric had the dignity, the tolerance, to contribute enough patience for someone. Was that even possible? How is that possible? After spending his entire existence guarding his emotions until nothing but anger pours out of his very being, how could all of that vanish so quickly every time he sees those beautiful, emerald eyes avoid his own bitter, golden ones?

He was now so vulnerable; weak; unguarded. But if he ever had the choice to become so defenseless, sensitive, towards anyone's timid gaze, he wouldn't mind the unlucky bastard to be him. His best friend. His lover. His world.

* * *

_ Soft, shaky whimpers were muffled by the contact of Eric's black leather jacket, the emotion hidden behind the small voice is a great comparison of the strong grip Spike had on his sleeves. His grip only tightened every time a small hitch escaped his painful sore throat, or when he felt his heart accelerate massively in his chest. Despite the brunette's jacket somewhat muting the sounds, every weak and shaky noise that escaped his partner didn't go unnoticed. They were approximately the same volume, even before he placed the trembling teen's head on his chest. They were only just a tad bit lower. _

_ Comfort was still immensely foreign to him. Throughout his entire existence, even as a kid, he thought that he didn't need anyone to hold on to, let alone be the person to do all of the holdings. Eric still believes in that statement. Part of the statement, anyway. He didn't need anyone to hold onto. He didn't need anyone's sympathy or pity. That's the way it should be, he assumed. The way it should always be. He didn't receive compassion, he wouldn't give compassion. It was as simple as that, right? That's the way life goes, right? No matter the circumstance, no matter the person, you give what you get? Wasn't that what he's been doing his entire life? _

_ Empathy was such a strange concept to wrap his head around. Assholes like Kahl and Wendy, no matter how many times they'd beat him over the head with him not even attempting to understand empathy, were surprisingly right, he mused. He'd never admit to them, or anyone that they were right out loud, obviously. He still had some amount of dignity he could claim he still has. _

_Spike's trembling and whimpering grew worse, but it was rather on impulse than the lack of comfort. That didn't cease the known psychopath's panicking, however. Three months wasn't enough time for him to become comfortable with his boyfriend's panic attacks. Kahl, the hippie, Wendy, and the blonde whore would immediately bitch and moan about him not even choosing to make the effort to get to understand Spike, let alone severe anxiety._

_Normally, he wouldn't take his precious time to think twice about what any of those dicks had to say. What anyone had to say. He didn't need to. He didn't have to. He **shouldn't **have to._

_But... maybe they were right? Maybe he wasn't doing his best to be a comforting boyfriend. Maybe he was just as much of an uncaring, demented asshole towards his quivering companion as he was towards everyone else._

_He couldn't be, though. If he really didn't have even the slightest bit of concern for his boyfriend, he wouldn't be sitting inside of his closest with the drake's head on his chest. He wouldn't be gently rubbing his back, placing chaste kisses onto his forehead. He wouldn't be beating himself over this if he didn't care. Right?_

_Fuck, he was a mess._

_Broken gasps and a tight grasp onto his bicep advised him that he needed to say something. Anything. He didn't say anything to him in two minutes, and his weak ass attempt at comfort wasn't doing shit. _

_Eric let out a sigh mentally, biting his lip as he strived for a way to get him to calm down. He let out another internal sigh before forcing a soft, reassuring smile onto his lips. The older teen tilted Spike's head away from his chest so their eyes would lock. He was met with red, puffy eyes, and he immediately missed those green emeralds he loved so much. The drake's rapid breath was hitting his forehead, gaze traveling everywhere but his face. The dragon's hold on the brunette was getting tighter and tighter, surprisingly if we put the size of his body into consideration._

_Spike was only seen for a few seconds before he disappeared again, his head now in the crook of Eric's neck. Nails were now digging into his upper arms, but Eric didn't even care. He wanted to console him, reassure him that everything would be okay, even if he didn't believe it himself. But he wanted to see his face. He wanted to talk to him directly. He should've known that it was only going to make his partner even more anxious and exposed._

_'Fucking dumbass, ' he thought to himself bitterly._

_Biting the inside of his cheek softly, he began to travel his hands upward towards his lover's messy green hair. Spike's mind began to shut down at the feeling of Eric's chubby and pale fingers running through his hair. Even through his constant whimpering, he couldn't help the small satisfied sigh that escaped his throat._

_Spike loved it when Eric messed with hi_s_ hair. He would always be so gentle. So slow. So caring. That's why he loved him. That's one of the reasons why he loved him._

_Feeling that sense of boldness he was practically born with, Eric bit his lip before bringing his mouth towards the other boy's ear. Spike felt Eric's _u_nsteady, yet calming breath on his ear, and he couldn't help_ _hiding even more in the embrace his boyfriend drunk him in._

_"H-hey, sweetheart, you're going to be okay. Everything's going to be okay, " he whispered in Spike's ear softly._

_He felt Spike shake his head immediately at the promise. Eric somewhat expected that. His boyfriend wasn't an idiot. He knew that. Even during his bad days like today, he knew he was still competent enough to catch him in a lie. Even if it had good intentions._

_He couldn't help but smile weakly at that. He was always so good at that. His smile quickly disappeared though when he finally heard Spike's now shaky, hoarse voice._

_"I-I'm so sorry, E-Eric..." Spike stuttered in a small, shaky voice. "Y-You don't need this... I-I'm always sl-slowing you down..."_

_Fresh, new tears ran through his cheeks and onto Eric's neck and collar as Spike began to wheeze and whimper a lot faster than before. His words were stuck in his throat, and he was now back to where he started before he was found out by his boyfriend._

_Why? Why did he have to slow down everyone he loved? Why was he such a nuisance? Twilight, her friends, Eric... Why did he have to be so weak? So useless..? He clutched onto Eric's arms tighter now, hiding further into the nape of Eric's neck. He began to let out even more shaky gasps, almost to the point where he was hyperventilating._

_Eric felt his heart break at that. When did someone like Eric Cartman get a heart? Somewhere in between meeting the perfectly imperfect sweetheart in his arms, and getting to know that he was his world. _

_Why was he so useless when it came to things like this? Why was this any harder than anything he's ever done when he was younger? _

_He wanted to convince himself that he didn't know, but he wasn't that much of a dumbass. He was too awfully cunning to be that fucking stupid._

_He held him against his chest a little more, which was a bad idea if the acceleration of Spike's breathing weren't any indication._

_"No, no, baby, you're not doing anything wrong... Such an absurd thought, " he murmured in his ear, hands roaming down his backside._

_He tried to speak as calm as he could towards Spike. Even during his better days, the awkward teen was always an exception. Even if in the back of his mind, the annoying voices of people he wished he could never associate with telling him otherwise. Especially himself._

_"I-I always d-do, " Spike stammered again in a weak voice, moving a little closer towards Eric's comforting hands._

_Eric chewed the bottom of his lip in thought, trying to keep his pathetic tears from streaming down his pale face. He sighed softly before kissing Spike's neck in a soothing matter. Hearing the low but existent sigh coming from the boy in his embrace, he continued to leave more delicate kisses onto his neck and collarbone, trying to be as soothing as he could manage._

_"I love you so much, babe. You know that, don't you?" He asked him in a whisper._

_A slow, shaky nod was his response._

_"Good, " he murmured sweetly before picking Spike up to sit him onto his lap._

_"You're not useless in any way. You're the most perfect creature on this shitty planet, love, " he continued, rubbing comforting circles onto his back._

_Spike shivered at the compliment, a fierce blush hitting his cheeks. No one ever said to him. Ever. Not even Twilight and the others. But he knew they loved him. _

_Eric, while not even meeting them personally,(yet), he didn't really care for them. He only cared for Spike, and Spike only. Everyone else was irrelevant to him. Sure, he was known to be vulgar and rude and an asshole, but Spike... he was too precious for that. He was too good for that. He deserved better. And he's trying his best to give him everything he deserves._

_It took a few more minutes before Spike calmed down a bit. He was still sniffing and holding onto Eric for dear life, but he was much better._

_He kissed his forehead sweetly before checking in. "Better?"_

_"Y-Yeah... Thank you so much, Eric... I love you."_

_"Anything for you, dear. I love you, too."_

_He continued to comfort and soothe him, whispering sweet nothings into his ear. They won't be able to come out to Spike's friends for a while, Eric knew. Towards anyone else, he would say it was a "bitchy move". But to Spike..._

_He'll give him as long as he needs to. _


End file.
